As salam alikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatu my beautiful sisters in Islam welcome to episode 2 of this new series
called: The Evolved Muslimah. On today’s episode, we’re going to talk about the
gift of confidence Confidence.. we don’t enter the world with
it and no one has it all of the time. We women have particular difficulty
developing self-confidence we instinctively focus on everyone but
ourselves . So taking the time for self development doesn’t come naturally to us. We turn on the television or check out social medias and are bombarded by
examples of women with great self-confidence they have a kind of
“je ne sais quoi” that we can’t seem to muster. I must tell you, I love being a woman but
it’s hard! We face so many challenges but of all the barriers women still face
one of the biggest is the lack of self-confidence and belief in our own
worth. We work hard to do a great job, to keep all the plates spinning and scale
the high bars we often set for ourselves. Yet for many women, it’s still never
enough. No matter how much we squeeze into any 24-hour block, we still feel
like we’re falling short on some measure; that we’re just not “enough” in some way.
If only.. we were more organized, more disciplined, more assertive, more
strategic, surer of ourselves..maybe then we’d reach the top and make the mark we
know in our heart of hearts we were born to make. It’s like that little voice in
our heads just doesn’t let up, continually critiquing what we didn’t do
or what we haven’t yet done. You know sisters, self-confidence means
being aware of what Allah has given you of good characteristics and striving
accordingly to attain that which will benefit you. If you misuse it you will be
filled with arrogance and self admiration, which are too destructive
problems and if you deny those blessings that have been given to you and the good
characteristics that Allah has blessed you with, you’ll become lazy and
apathetic. You will let yourself down and lose the blessing Allah has given you. It
is worth pointing out something important here, which is that for the
Muslimah, having self-confidence does not mean that she does not need the help of
her Lord and it does not mean that she does not need people in general to advise
her and help her. This is what the prophet salallahu alayhi wa salam asked his Lord for, which was: not to be left to himself or his own devices, not even for
the blink of an eye! Putting your trust in Allah, depending
upon him and seeking support and help from him. The Muslimah can not do
without her Lord may He be exalted. The more you put your trust in the Lord, the
greater your self confidence will grow and reach the highest level. When Musa
(Moses) and his people fled for Pharaoh and his troops, and the two sides saw one
another, we see the trust that Musa had in his lord. Allah Azzawajal said in surah
26 verse 61 and 62: strong points are and increasing them. In
order to develop self-confidence it is essential to look with gratitude at what
Allah has given you of skills and characteristics, so that this will
motivate you to strengthen your self-confidence. With regard to your weak
points, you have to try to deal with them and develop them so that they reach the
same levels as your other good skills and characteristics.
Remember, personal development is the belief that you are worth the effort,
time and energy needed to develop yourself.
stop negative self-talk such as saying that you are incompetent, that you can do
anything right or that you don’t measure up anybody’s else’s standards. You know
we prey to it because someone, at some point in our life, taught us to do so.
Usually unconsciously and often with the best of intentions. But you can fight
back, fight back! Change your story! Those stories you tell yourself are often a
long way from the truth but, they have the power to shape your life if you buy
into them. So, if you’ve been telling yourself a story that you too old, too
young, too timid, too inexperienced, too pretty or not enough of something to
take your seat at the table and be a powerful force for change, try telling
yourself another story and see what possibilities open up for you. Set
specific goals for your life and check on the outcome time after time. Because
the person who is self-confident will make sure that his goal is achieved on
the basis of good planning and with the help of Allah. So stick with it. When you
take on a new challenge, stick with it! Self-confidence does not come from each
thing you attempt. If it did, one fell effort will bring you back to zero on
the confidence scale. True confidence develops from an increasing belief that
you can rely on yourself to take action and follow through, no matter what the
result. Seek righteous companions. Because that will give you a motive to succeed
and encourage you to make greater efforts. The righteous companions will
not overlook your weak points; rather they will guide you to follow the better
path. Therefore, good companions are one of the factors of success for the
confident Muslimah. Don’t be distracted by previous difficult experiences and
past failures. Because that will spoil your efforts and make you look down on
what you have achieved of success. Confidence gives you the skills and
coping methods to handle setbacks and failure. Self-confidence doesn’t mean you
won’t sometimes fail. But you’ll know you can handle challenges and not be
crippled by them. So even when things don’t turn out anywhere close to what
you planned; you will be able to avoid beating yourself up. So, as you keep
pushing yourself to try new things, you’ll start to understand how failure and
mistakes lead to growth. An acceptance that failure is part of life will start
to take root. Paradoxically, by being more willing to fail, you’ll actually succeed
more. Because you’re not waiting for everything to be a hundred percent
before you act. Taking more shots will mean making more of them. Perfectionism
is the most paralyzing form of self-abuse. so act “as if”. If you put off
taking actions until you have the confidence, you’ll never do it. In the
field of psychology, we have come to understand that by changing our behavior,
we can change our feelings. If you take actions, and do so with a semblance of
outward confidence, the inward true feeling of confidence will follow. How to
know when you receive the gift of confidence? When you will receive the
gift of confidence, you’ll have a stronger sense of your authentic self.
You’ll be able to accept your weaknesses, knowing they don’t change yourself worth. You will also be able to celebrate your strengths and use them more fully. Your
actions will be in line with your principles, giving you a greater sense of
purpose. You’ll know who you are and what you stand for. You’ll have the skills to
show up and stand up for yourself. In other words, you’ll be able to let your
best self shine through. And the real gift of confidence is the belief that I
am one of Allah’s creatures that has been given blessings
by a being who has control over these blessings and who would not be harmed
were he to deprive me of all of them. We would be ungrateful if we did not think
of the scheme of our existence in this manner. The opposite end of the spectrum is
being overconfident of oneself and one’s deeds. This causes human being to
consider himself free of need of Allah, therefore neglecting his grace. Tawakkul
possesses an inspiring, revitalizing and regenerating meaning that increases
one’s endurance and resilience. Thank you so much for watching.
JazakAllah khair. May Allah rewards you with goodness. If you’re new on this channel, don’t forget to subscribe so you won’t miss out on future content. Save the
playlist The Evolved Muslimah and it will inspire you to become who you were
always meant to be. I’ll see you in the next video inshallah as Salaam aleikum

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