Rock Church – Josh McDowell – Love Defined

Rock Church – Josh McDowell – Love Defined


GOOD MORNING! WHOA! WHAT BETTER PLACE TO BE IN ON A
GORGEOUS DAY LIKE THIS THAN AT THE ROCK, THE ONLY THING MISSING
IS MILES. I KNEW HE WASN’T GOING TO BE
HERE, BUT WE CHATTED ON THE PHONE THIS MORNING. BUT OVER THE YEARS I CAN
LITERALLY SAY THAT MILES HAS BEEN A ROCK, REALLY HAS. BECAUSE THAT IS BECAUSE OF HIS
SENIOR PASTOR, JESUS. THIS MORNING I DON’T WANT TO
SPEAK TO YOUR HEARTS, I WANT TO SPEAK TO YOUR MINDS. YOU HEAR ME? THAT’S THE BIBLICAL WAY. YOU DON’T LET YOUR HEART GUARD
YOUR MINDS, YOU LET YOUR MIND GUARD YOUR HEART. SO I WANT YOU TO GRASP
INTELLECTUALLY WHAT I AM GOING TO BE SHARING. AND THEN GOD THE HOLY SPIRIT CAN
TAKE IT DOWN AND APPLY IT TO YOUR LIFE, RELATIONSHIPS AND
WITH HIM AND OTHERS AND PARENTS AND GRANDPARENTS AND CHILDREN,
WHATEVER. I AM GOING TO SPEAK ON JUST ONE
WORD. JUST ABOUT ONE WORD. I WILL SAY MORE THAN ONE WORD. BUT IT WILL BE ON ONE WORD. AND IT’S A WORD, PROBABLY THE
MOST IMPORTANT WORD IN ANY LANGUAGE, ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD. IT’S THE WORD THAT EVERYONE OF
YOU WOULD SAY IT’S PROBABLY THE MOST IMPORTANT WORD IN YOUR
VOCABULARY. IT’S A WORD SO MISUNDERSTOOD. I WOULD SAY 98% OF BELIEVERS,
FOLLOWERS OF JESUS CAN’T DEFINE THIS WORD, AND YOU SAY HOW YOU
KNOW THAT. I TESTED IT FOR 54 YEARS, IT’S
THE WORD LOVE. A WORD THAT WE TAKE FOR GRANTED
AND YET WE DON’T UNDERSTAND IT. HOW DO YOU DEFINE LOVE. IF YOU CAN’T DEFINE LOVE, HOW DO
YOU KNOW YOU ARE BEING LOVED. IF YOU CAN’T DEFINE LOVE, HOW DO
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LOVING SOMEONE. IF YOU CAN’T DEFINE LOVE, HOW DO
YOU KNOW YOU HAVE A LOVING RELATIONSHIP AND LOVING MARRIAGE
AND FAMILY IF YOU CAN’T DEFINE IT? YOU CAN’T. AND YET 1-2% BELIEVERS IN THE
WORLD CAN’T DEFINE LOVE. HOW DO YOU DEFINE LOVE? IF I TOOK A MICROPHONE AND
WALKED INTO THE AUDIENCE AND PROBABLY DIFFERENT BECAUSE OF
MILES, YOU ARE PROBABLY A NOTCH ABOVE MOST PLACES I GO — I HOPE
THIS ISN’T BEING RECORDED. NO, IF I TAKE A MICROPHONE AND
GO IN THE AUDIENCE LIKE I HAVE HUNDREDS OF TIMES, AND I SAY
DEFINE LOVE. IT’S PROBABLY BEEN ANYONE HAS
BEEN ABLE TO DEFINE LOVE. DEFINE LOVE. DEFINE LOVE. ALMOST THREE OF THE FIRST FIVE
ANSWERS IS THESE, AND PROBABLY HERE. I WILL SAY DEFINE LOVE AND THEY
WILL PUFF UP THEIR CHEST AND SAY, GOD. IT’S SO BAD. YES, GOD IS LOVE. BUT FOLKS IF YOU CAN’T DEFINE
LOVE, THAT’S A MEANINGLESS STATEMENT. YOU DON’T DEFINE LOVE BY SAYING
GOD. GOD IS LOVE. BUT RIGHT IN THIS ROOM WE
PROBABLY HAVE 500-600 DIFFERENT DEFINITIONS OF LOVE. AND PROBABLY 500-600 DIFFERENT
DEFINITIONS OF GOD. THAT’S CRAZY. AND OTHERS I SAY DEFINE LOVE,
AND THIS ALWAYS COMES IN THE FIRST TWO OR THREE. I CORINTHIANS 13. THAT IS SO BAD. REALLY. NOW COME ON. HAVE YOU READ — NO, HAVE YOU
STUDIED I CORINTHIANS 13. SHOW ME ONE WORSE THAT DEFINES
LOVE. NOWHERE. EVERYONE SAYS IT’S THE LOVE
VERSE. IT DOESN’T DEFINE LOVE. I CORINTHIANS 13 SHOWS WHAT LOVE
DOES, NOT WHAT LOVE IS. NOW WHAT IS IT THAT PRODUCES I
CORINTHIANS 13? THAT IS LOVE. AND THEN ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE A
GROUP OF YOUNG PEOPLE, AND HALF ADULTS, I SAY DEFINE LOVE. THEY WILL SAY IT’S A FEELING. YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD SAYING THAT
BUT ANYWAY. LOVE CAN’T BE A FEELING. IF LOVE WOULD BE A FEELING, GOD
COULDN’T COMMAND IT. NOW THINK IT THROUGH. YOU CAN’T COMMAND AN EMOTION. YOU CAN’T SAY TO SOMEONE, FEEL
BETTER. YOUR MOTHER CAN SAY, YOU ARE
GOING TO EAT YOUR ASPARAGUS, SHE CAN COMMAND THAT, BUT CAN’T
COMMAND YOU THAT YOU ARE GOING TO LIKE IT. ESPECIALLY IF IT’S LIVER. YOU ARE GOING TO GO TO SCHOOL
TODAY AND YOU ARE GOING TO LIKE IT. NO, SHE CAN MAKE YOU GO TO
SCHOOL BUT NOT MAKE YOU LIKE IT. IT’S AN EMOTION. LOVE DOES RESULT IN A FEELING,
BUT THAT’S THE RESULT OF LOVE, NOT WHAT LOVE IS. SO HOW DO YOU DEFINE LOVE? TO BE ABLE TO COMMAND SOMETHING
LIKE LOVE, LOVE ONE ANOTHER. LOVE WOULD HAVE TO BE WHAT? TO COMMAND SOMETHING, IT HAS TO
BE WHAT? ANYONE, JUST YELL IT OUT. ACTION. A CHOICE. THINK IT THROUGH. TO COMMAND SOMEONE TO DO
SOMETHING, THERE HAS TO BE AN ACT OF THE WILL. A CHOICE THAT RESULTS IN AN
ACTION, LIKE I CORINTHIANS 13. SO IT HAS TO BE A CHOICE THAT
LEADS TO AN ACTION OF LOVE OR GOD COULDN’T COMMAND IT. THE REASON THAT THIS IS
IMPORTANT, EVANGELICAL CHRISTIANS IN AMERICA IN A
STUDY, 38% IF YOU LOVE SOMETHING THEN IT MAKES MARRIAGE RIGHT. WHAT HAS HAPPENED IS THIS. PASTORS TEACH US YOU SHALL LOVE
ONE ANOTHER. YOU SHOULD BE A LOVING PERSON. LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR. LOVE YOUR MATE. LOVE YOUR CHILDREN, LOVE, LOVE. LOVE GOD. BUT NEVER DEFINE IT. I WILL GO IN A CROWD OF 5,000
PEOPLE FROM ALL DIFFERENT CHURCHES AND EVERYTHING. AND I WILL SAY, HOW MANY OF YOU
HERE HAVE HAD YOUR PASTOR FROM PULPIT NOT TALK ABOUT LOVE, ALL
PASTORS TALK ABOUT LOVE. BUT LITERALLY THEY HAVE DEFINED
LOVE FROM THE PULPIT. AND OUT OF 5,000 PEOPLE IN A
CONFERENCE, AT THE MOST SIX HANDS WILL GO UP, USUALLY THREE. LET ME DO SOMETHING HERE, HOW
MANY OF YOU HAD YOUR PARENTS, YOUR MOM AND DAD, NOT TALK ABOUT
LOVE. ALL PARENTS TALK ABOUT LOVE
USUALLY. NOW IF YOU RAISE YOUR HAND, I
MAY ASK YOU TO DEFINE IT. HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE HAD YOUR
MOM AND DAD NOT JUST TALK ABOUT LOVE BUT LITERALLY DEFINED LOVE
FOR YOU. THERE HAS TO BE ONE HAND
SOMEWHERE. RIGHT THERE. BLESS YOU MY DAUGHTER. WHAT IS THE DEFINITION? LOVE IS PATIENT, LOVE IS KIND. MA’AM — THAT’S WHAT LOVE DOES,
NOT WHAT LOVE IS. THAT’S WHAT THEY TELL YOU. BOY, YOU ARE GOOD. BOY, YOU ARE PERSONALITY “A.” I BET NO ONE MEETS YOU, THEY
ENCOUNTER YOU LADY, I LOVE THAT. THAT’S A CRIME. IN THE DAY OF THE INTERNET? MY CHURCH NOW, MY HOME CHURCH IS
ABOUT 34,000 PEOPLE. MANY CHURCHES LIKE YOU HAVE,
SATELLITE CHURCHES. AND I LOVE MY PASTOR. OH, I LOVE HIM. HE’S ABOUT THE ONLY MAN I TRAVEL
ALL NIGHT TO BE THERE TO HEAR HIM. AND ABOUT A YEAR-AND-A-HALF AGO
HE WAS SPEAKING ON LOVE FOR 40 MINUTES. ABOUT 30 MINUTES IN, HE WAS
TELLING US HOW TO BE A LOVING PERSON AND LOVE ONE ANOTHER AND
HUSBANDS LOVE YOUR WIVES. AND IN THE COMMUNITY WE SHOULD
LOVE OUR NEIGHBOR. AND DOTTIE TURNED TO ME, AND
SAID, ISN’T THIS A WONDERFUL SERMON. AND I SAID, NO IT’S HORRIBLE. SHE SAID HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT. I SAID IT’S TRUE, IT’S A
DANGEROUS SERMON. SHE SAID WHAT DO YOU MEAN. LISTEN TO WHAT OUR PASTOR TAUGHT
TO LOVE ONE ANOTHER AND LOVE GOD AND LOVE YOUR CHILDREN AND THE
MARK OF THE COMMUNITY IS LOVE, AND BE A LOVING PERSON. I SAID HE NEVER ONCE DEFINED
LOVE. NEVER ONCE. AND I HAVE NEVER HEARD ANYONE DO
IT. DEFINE LOVE. EXCEPT ONE TIME, T-BO DID IT,
BOY, IT WAS GOOD, HE DEFINED LOVE BETTER THAN HE CAN PLAY
FOOTBALL, AND HE CAN PLAY FOOTBALL GOOD. I HAVEN’T WATCHED HIM YET. I SAID HONEY THIS IS DANGEROUS
TO, SPEAK ON LOVE AND NOT DEFINE LOVE IS DANGEROUS. WHAT WE HAVE DONE AS PARENTS AND
PASTORS AND LEADERSHIP AND AUTHORS AND SPEAKERS AND WE
COMMAND ONE ANOTHER TO LOVE ONE ANOTHER. WHAT WE HAVE DONE, WE LET THE
WORLD DEFINE LOVE. FOR YOUNG PEOPLE, THE CHURCH
NEVER DEFINED LOVE FOR THEM. AND THE WORLD DEFINES LOVE, LOVE
IS SEX, AND SEX IS LOVE. WHY DO YOU THINK THAT 38% OF
CHRISTIAN YOUNG PEOPLE SAY IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE, SEX IS OKAY. BECAUSE THE CHURCH DEFINED LOVE? NO, WE LET THE WORLD DEFINE IT. IF I PUT A VIDEO UP HERE SHOWING
A COUPLE HAVING SEX — MILES WOULD BE BACK. BUT EVERYONE HERE WOULD SAY,
THAT’S AWFUL, THEY ARE MAKING LOVE. WATCH THE DETECTIVES SHOWS ON
TELEVISION, LIKE SUV OR SVU — SUV IS A VEHICLE. SO IT MUST BE SVU, LAW AND
ORDER. AND THE DETECTIVE SAID GO UP AND
FIND OUT IF THEY WERE MAKING LOVE LAST NIGHT. WHY? WE HAVE LET THE WORLD DEFINE
LOVE FOR US. HOW DO YOU DEFINE LOVE? WE OWE IT TO OUR CHILDREN. WE OWE A STANDARD TO OUR
CHILDREN. MY THREE DAUGHTERS, I OWE IT
WHEN A YOUNG MAN SAYS TO HER, I LOVE YOU AND I WANT TO SHOW MY
LOVE TO YOU. I NEED TO GIVE MY DAUGHTER A
STANDARD. I WOULD SAY 99% OF CHRISTIAN
YOUNG LADIES HAVE NO STANDARD TO EVALUATE THAT. THERE IS ONLY ONE PLACE IN THE
BIBLE I KNOW WHERE LOVE IS DEFINED. I AM NOT SAYING THERE ARE OTHER
PLACES. BUT MY GOOGLE SEARCH ENGINE HAS
ONLY FOUND ONE PLACE EPHESIANS 5:20, YEAH IT’S NOT I
CORINTHIANS. AND LISTEN TO IT, HUSBANDS TO
LOVE THEIR OWN WIVES AS — WHAT, AS THEIR OWN BODIES? NO. YOU SHOULD LOVE YOUR WIFE THE
WAY YOU LOVE GOD. NO. YOU LOVE YOUR WIFE AS YOU LOVE
YOUR OWN BODY. FOR HE WHO LOVES HIS OWN LIFE
LOVES HIMSELF. I THOUGHT YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED
TO LOVE YOURSELF. ISN’T THAT NARCISSISTIC, THOSE
THAT USE THAT TERM CAN’T SPELL IT. BUT ISN’T IT NARCISSISM, ISN’T
THAT WRONG TO LOVE YOURSELF? DOESN’T IT SOUND LIKE MATTHEW
22:36, THE RELIGIOUS LEADERS ARE TRYING TO BACK JESUS INTO A
CORNER — BOY, THAT WILL BE FUN TO WATCH. THEY SAID, TEACHER, WHAT IS THE
GREATEST COMMANDMENT IN THE LAW, WHAT IS THE TOP DOG. JESUS REPLIED LOVE YOUR LORD
YOUR GOD WITH ALL OF YOUR SOUL, WITH ALL YOUR HEART AND ALL OF
YOUR MIND. AND JESUS BACKED THEM INTO A
CORNER, THE SECOND COMMANDMENT IS THIS, LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS
YOURSELF. I THOUGHT YOU WEREN’T SUPPOSED
TO LOVE YOURSELF? MY DAUGHTER KATY, WHEN SHE WAS
SIX YEARS OLD HEARD ME SPEAK ON THIS. AND SHE WAS QUIET IN THE CAR AND
SAID, DADDY, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU SPOKE ON, I SAID YES. LOVE YOUR NEIGHBORS AS YOURSELF. SHE SAID, DADDY, IF YOU DON’T
LOVE YOURSELF, YOUR NEIGHBOR REALLY HAS PROBLEMS. NO THINK OF THAT. THAT’S PROFOUND. THIS IS WHY I RAISED MY THREE
DAUGHTERS AND I WOULD SAY TO ANYONE YOUNG LADY HERE, I WOULD
SAY TO ANY YOUNG LADY HERE. DON’T EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER
MARRY A MAN THAT DOES NOT LOVE HIMSELF. BECAUSE YOUR MARRIAGE WILL BE IN
TROUBLE. I AM CONVINCED THE NUMBER ONE
REASON FOR DIVORCE TODAY, NOT THE ONLY, BUT NUMBER ONE AMONG
CHRISTIANS AND IT’S HIGH, AS HIGH WITH ATHEISM AND AGNOSTICS. THE NUMBER ONE CAUSE FOR DIVORCE
TODAY IS FOR A MAN THAT HAS NEVER BEEN TAUGHT HOW TO LOVE
HIMSELF AND HE DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO LOVE HIS WIFE AND CHILDREN,
AND IS USED AND ABUSED ALL IN THE NAME OF LOVE. BECAUSE NO ONE EVER DEFINED IT. BUT YOU SAY JOSH. LOVE — LOVE YOURSELF? JOSH, HAVEN’T YOU READ II
TIMOTHY 3:2. YEAH, I HAVE, HAVE YOU? HAVE YOU STUDIED IT. MOST CHRISTIANS READ IT, THEY
DON’T STUDY IT. I HAVE NEVER HEARD ONE SERMON ON
LOVE YOUR NEIGHBORS YOURSELF THAT YOU NEED TO LOVE YOURSELF
AND HOW TO DO IT. NEVER HAVE HEARD ONE SERMON —
NOT SAYING THERE HAVEN’T BEEN, BUT BOY YOU HAVE HEARD SERMONS
ON II TIMOTHY 2, BY EVANGELISTS, AND IT SAYS, ONE OF THE SIGNS OF
LATTER DAYS THAT MEN WILL BECOME LOVERS OF THEMSELVES. AND YOU CANNOT BELIEVE,
ESPECIALLY I SPEAK ON A PASTORS’ SEMINAR ON THIS, AND PASTORS
WILL SPEAK UP. AND I MILK IT. AND HAVEN’T YOU READ II TIMOTHY
2, AND WHAT IS GOING TO BE A SIN IN THE LATTER DAYS. THAT’S CRAZY, FOLKS DON’T READ
YOUR BIBLE, STUDY IT. WORD BY WORD BY WORD. WHAT YOU FIND IN JESUS IN
MATTHEW 22 AND PAUL IN EPHESIANS 5, THEY USE ONE WORD FOR LOVE,
THE WORD THAT IS USED HERE IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT. IT DOESN’T EVEN RELATE. IN II TIMOTHY 3:2 THE WORD IS
PHILATOS, THAT’S MADE UP OF TWO ROOT WORDS LIKE A LOT OF GREEK
WORDS ARE. PHILATOS. NOW PHILA CAN BE USED AS A WORD
FOR LOVE, AND I HAVE DONE IT MYSELF, BUT IT’S MORE OF A DEEP,
AFFECTIONATE RELATIONSHIP. WHERE YOU THINK OF THE OTHER
PERSON’S FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS. ALTO MEANS ME, I WILL SIGN THE
BOOK. AUTONOMOUS, I AM THE SOURCE OF
MY BEING. WHEN THEY WERE CREATING THE CAR,
THEY SAID WE NEED A WORD TO MARKET THE CAR, ANYONE OUT THERE
KNOWS THAT. WE NEED A WORD TO MARKET THE CAR
TO SEPARATE OUR MEANS OF TRANSPORTATION. YOU HAVE A TRAIN, AND YOU HAVE
AN ENGINEER AND WE NEED A WORD THAT THE CAR IS UNIQUE AND YOU
YOURSELF TAKE YOURSELF TO YOUR DESTINATION. THEY WANTED TO APPEAL TO THAT,
SO WHAT WORD DID THEY COME UP WITH, AUTO-MOBILE. I MOVE MYSELF TO MY DESTINATION. NOW WHEN YOU PUT PHILTO, IT
REALLY CHANGES. IT CHANGES TO A VERY
SELFISHNESS. ME. I. MY NEEDS NOT YOUR NEEDS. MY DESIRES, NOT YOUR DESIRES. MY DESIRES HAVE NOTHING TO DO
WITH GOD’S DESIRES OR ANYTHING. AND IT’S ACTUALLY DESCRIBED IN I
JOHN 1:18, THEIR PURPOSE IS TO SATISFY THEIR OWN DESIRES. OR II TIMOTHY 3:2, PEOPLE WILL
BE LOVERS OF THEMSELVES. THAT’S WHAT IS USED IN TIMOTHY. AND MATTHEWS AND EPHESIANS THE
WORD IS AGAPE. AGAPE MANY SAY IS GOD’S LOVE. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH
SAYING THAT. AGAPE IS ANOTHER PERSON CENTERED
LOVE. IT’S WHEN YOU THINK OF THE OTHER
PERSON BEFORE YOURSELF. THEIR NEEDS, NOT YOUR NEEDS. THEIR HURTS, NOT YOUR HURTS. THEIR WANTS AND NOT YOUR WANTS. GOD’S DESIRES AND NOT YOUR
DESIRES. AGAPE. BUT YOU SAY, JOSH, YOU MADE A
MISTAKE, YOU LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR LIKE YOURSELF BUT YOU HAVE TO
LOVE YOURSELF. AND HERE YOU HAVE TO THINK OF
THE OTHER PERSON FIRST. FIRST OF ALL, I DIDN’T SAY THE
OTHER, JESUS DID. TAKE IT UP WITH HIM, NOT ME. BUT HERE’S THE PROBLEM, SO MANY
PEOPLE DON’T UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT OF AGAPE. FOLKS IT’S BEAUTIFUL. AGAPE PRETTY WELL MEANS IF YOU
DO NOT AGAPE YOURSELF FIRST, YOU DO NOT HAVE THE CAPACITY TO
AGAPE SOMEONE ELSE. WHEN I GIVE YOU THE DEFINITION,
YOU WILL SEE THIS. IT BASICALLY MEANS IF YOU DON’T
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF, YOU DON’T HAVE THE CAPACITY TO TAKE CARE
OF SOMEONE ELSE. YOU SAY WHAT? WELL, LET ME TRY TO ILLUSTRATE
THIS. THIS HELPED ME MORE THAN
ANYTHING, IN FLYING I HAVE MADE MORE THAN 19,000 FLIGHTS, AND
THAT’S 40,000 TIMES, AND I HAVE SEEN EVERYTHING. BUT EVERY AIRPLANE I HAVE TAKEN,
I HEAR THIS, AND DOESN’T MATTER WHAT LANGUAGE OR ANYTHING. YOU MAY HAVE HEARD IT IF YOU
HAVE FLOWN — MAYBE NOT IF MALAYSIA AIRLINE. IF YOU HAVE HEARD DELTA, AND THE
FLIGHT ATTENDANT IS SAYING THANK YOU FOR CHOOSING DELTA — IT
WASN’T A CHOICE, YOU WERE THE ONLY. BUT THANK YOU FOR CHOOSING DELTA
AND IF ANY PROBLEM A MASK WILL COME OUT AND THE MOTHER SAYS, I
HAVE TO AGAPE ME CHILD. NEVER DO THAT. THEY WARN YOU, WHAT DO THEY NEXT
SAY. BEFORE YOU PUT THE MASK ON YOUR
CHILD, PUT IT ON YOURSELF FIRST. IN OTHER WORDS AGAPE YOURSELF
FIRST BEFORE YOU AGAPE YOUR CHILD. WHY? THERE IT IS, YOU HAVE SEEN THAT. PULL IT OUT OF THE BACK OF THE
SEAT. PROBABLY SOME IN THERE. WHAT DOES SHE SAY, I HAVE SEEN
IT THREE TIMES. IT’S HARD TO PUT A MASK ON A
CHILD. THEY WILL GO NO-NO. ONCE YOU GET IT ON, YOU HAVE TO
HOLD IT ON, BUT HERE’S THE PROBLEM. YOU WILL PASS OUT AND YOU BOTH
WOULD DIE. SO THEY SAY, FIRST AGAPE
YOURSELF. PROTECT YOURSELF FIRST. ONLY TAKES ABOUT TWO SECONDS. YOU PUT YOUR MASK ON AND THEN
YOU ARE FREE TO TRULY AGAPE YOUR CHILD. PUT THE MASK ON AND HOLD IT AND
YOU BOTH WILL LIVE. THAT’S WHAT AGAPE MEANS. IF YOU DON’T AGAPE YOURSELF
FIRST, YOU DON’T HAVE THE CAPACITY OF THINK OF OTHERS
FIRST AND FILL THEIR NEEDS. AND LET ALONE TO THINK OF IT, TO
THINK OF THEIR NEEDS IF YOU ARE NOT MEETING YOURS FIRST. LET ME DEFINE LOVE. THE ONLY PLACE IN THE BIBLE IS
EPHESIANS 5:29, REMEMBER IT SAYS THIS, HUSBANDS LOVE YOUR WIFE. FOR HE THAT LOVES HIS WIFE,
LOVES HIMSELF. NOW THE MODEL IS TO LOVE YOUR
MATE AS YOU LOVE YOUR OWN BODY. THAT’S THE MODEL. NOW THE NEXT VERSE SAYS, FOR NO
ONE HATETH HIS OWN FLESH. THE OPPOSITE OF LOVING YOUR OWN
FLESH. FOR IT SAYS NO ONE HATETH HAS
OWN FLESH, BUT — WHAT DOES IT INTRODUCE, THE OPPOSITE OF
HATING YOUR OWN FLESH. AND NO ONE HATETH HIS OWN FLESH
BUT NURTURES AND CHERISHES IT. THE IT IS NOT THE WIFE, IT’S THE
BODY. AND WHAT DOES IT SAY? FOR MY CHILDREN I HAD TO DEFINE
LOVE FOR THEM SIX OR SEVEN TIMES. BECAUSE KIDS FORGET JUST LIKE
ADULTS. THEY HAVE DIGITAL MINDS BUT NO
MEMORY CARDS. YOU HAVE TO KEEP REPEATING IT TO
THEM. AND THIS IS THE THIRD TIME I WAS
SHARING WITH MY SON, SEAN, HE WAS 11 OR 12. I SAID SON, I WANT TO DEFINE
LOVE TO YOU. AND I WENT AND QUOTED, BUT TO
NURTURE AND CHERISH. SON THAT IS LOVE. DADDY, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. I EXPLAINED TO HIM THREE TIMES. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN. I SAID, SON, TO NURTURE MEANS,
NOW THING WITH ME, TO BRING TO MATURITY. IN WHAT AREA, DADDY? WELL, THE BIBLE SAYS THAT JESUS
WAS BROUGHT TO MATURITY. JESUS WAS? YES, IN LUKE 2:52, IT SAYS,
JESUS KEPT INCREASING NURTURE, BRINGING TO MATURITY IN WISDOM
AND STATURE IN FAVOR OF GOD AND MEN. SO I SAID, IF YOU TRULY LOVE
YOURSELF THE WAY YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO. THERE ARE FOUR AREAS YOU NURTURE
YOURSELF TO MATURITY IN LOVE. ONE IS IN WISDOM. MENTALLY. SECOND IN STATUE, PHYSICALLY. THIRD IN FAVOR WITH GOD,
SPIRITUALLY. FOURTH, IN FAVOR WITH MEN
RELATIONALLY. SO I SAID, SON, IF I LOVE MYSELF
THE WAY I AM SUPPOSED TO BIBLICALLY, BY ACT OF MY WILL,
REMEMBER LOVE HAS TO BE AN ACT OF WILL. I CHOOSE TO NURTURE MYSELF TO
MATURITY. BUT SON, THAT IS ONLY HALF OF
LOVE. IT SAYS TO NURTURE AND TO
CHERISH. I GET NASTY E-MAILS, ESPECIALLY
FROM PASTORS. YOU ARE TEACHING YOUNG PEOPLE TO
ADORE THEMSELVES. WHERE DO YOU GET THAT? THAT IS NOT WHAT CHERISH MEANS. IT MEANS TO CARE FOR. IF YOU CHERISH SOMEONE, YOU CARE
FOR THEM. IF YOU CHERISH SOMETHING, YOU
CARE FOR IT. IN THE CONTEXT OF EPHESIANS IT
CARRIES THE CONNOTATION OF THIS. TO CARE IN THE SENSE TO PROTECT. SO I SAID, SON, IF YOUR FATHER
LOVES HIMSELF THE WAY HE IS SUPPOSED TO, THEN BY AN ACT OF
MY WILL, I CHOOSE TO NURTURE MYSELF TO MATURITY, PHYSICALLY,
MENTALLY, AND SPIRITUALLY RELATIONALLY. AND I PROTECT MYSELF FROM ANYONE
WHO HINDERS THAT PROCESS IN MY LIFE. BY THE MOVIES I WATCH AND THE
INTERNET AND THE MUSIC I LISTEN TO AND DOWN TO THE FRIENDS I
HAVE. AND WHAT I EAT AND DRINK,
ANYTHING THAT WOULD HINDER THAT NURTURING PROCESS, IF I TRULY
LOVE MYSELF, I WILL PROTECT MYSELF. AND THAT’S HOW I AM SUPPOSED TO
LOVE YOUR MOTHER. I AM TO LOVE HER BY MY OWN BODY. WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? BY AN ACT OF MY WILL I CHOOSE TO
NURTURE YOUR MOTHER TO MATURITY. AND IF I TRULY LOVE YOUR MOTHER,
THEN BY AN ACT OF MY WILL I CHOOSE TO PROTECT HER FROM
ANYTHING THAT WOULD HINDER THAT NURTURING PROCESS. MOVIES. VIDEOS. AND WHAT WE EAT AND DRINK,
ANYTHING THAT WOULD HINDER THAT PROCESS IN YOUR MOTHER. IF I TRULY LOVED HER THEN I
WOULD CHERISH HER. AND I SAY, SON, THAT IS HARD TO
REMEMBER. LET ME MAKE IT SIMPLE. SON, I AM GOING TO DO THE
IMPOSSIBLE. WHAT? YEAH, I WILL DO WHAT I SAY IS
IMPOSSIBLE TO DO. AND I ALWAYS SAY YOU CANNOT
DEFINED A MAJOR CONCEPT WITHOUT SEVEN TO NINE WORDS. WITHOUT LOSING MEANING TO IT,
SIGNIFICANCE. BUT I SAID, SON, I WILL DEFINE
THE MOST COMPLICATED CONCEPT IN THE UNIVERSE, LOVE, AND ACTUALLY
NO LOSS OF MEANING, IT WILL BE BIBLICAL. SON, TAKE THIS, WHERE THE BIBLE
SAYS TO NURTURE, IN YOUR MIND WRITE “PROVIDE,” THAT’S WHAT
NURTURE MEANS TO PROVIDE NUTRIENTS FOR GROWTH. MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY AND
SPIRITUALLY AND EMOTIONALLY. FOR EXAMPLE, IF MOTHER SAID WHEN
YOU COME HOME FROM SCHOOL TOMORROW, I WANT YOU TO
FERTILIZE THE FLOWER BED. SHE IS SAYING TO TAKE NUTRIENTS
AROUND THE FLOWERS SO THEY ARE NURTURED. SON, THIS IS WHAT IT MEANS IN
THE BIBLE TO NURTURE. TO PUT NUTRIENTS AROUND YOUR
LIFE, SPIRITUALLY AND PHYSICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY. SO YOU COME TO MATURITY. AND THEN IN PLACE OF CHERISH,
PUT “PROTECT.” AND SON, YOU NOW HAVE THE
SIMPLEST DEFINITION OF LOVE, TO PROTECT AND PROVIDE. IF I TRULY LOVE MYSELF, I WILL
PROVIDE MYSELF PHYSICALLY AND SPIRITUALLY AND RELATIONALLY TO
GROW AND PROTECT THAT. THIS IS HOW I LOVE MY NEIGHBOR. HOW DO YOU LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR? PROTECT AND PROVIDE. HUSBANDS, LOVE YOUR WIVES AS YOU
LOVE YOUR OWN BODIES. AND PROTECT AND PROVIDE. AND AGAPE YOU PROTECT AND
PROVIDE. BUT IF YOU ARE NOT PROTECTING
AND PROVIDING FOR YOURSELF, YOU WILL NOT HAVE THE CAPACITY TO
PROTECT AND PROVIDE FOR SOMEONE ELSE. IF YOU ARE NOT GROWING
SPIRITUALLY, HOW DO YOU PROVIDE SPIRITUAL GROWTH FOR ANOTHER? YOU WON’T. THAT’S WHAT AGAPE MEANS, TO
PROTECT AND PROVIDE FOR YOURSELF FIRST, SO YOU HAVE A BASIS FOR
LOVING YOUR NEIGHBOR AND CHILDREN AND SPOUSE, AND LOVING
OTHERS. PROTECT AND PROVIDE. NOW I BELIEVE I OWE MY CHILDREN
TWO MAJOR THINGS AND MY GRANDKIDS. ONE, A DEFINITION OF LOVE. I THINK IT’S SINFUL FOR A PARENT
TO RAISE A CHILD AND NEVER DEFINE LOVE AND LET THE WORLD
DEFINE LOVE. CAN YOU IMAGINE SAYING THIS TO A
CHILD, YOU SHOULD BE A LOVING PERSON, AND NOT DEFINE IT. AND LET THE WORLD DEFINE IT. YOU SEE HOW BAD THAT IS? FOR OUR GRANDCHILDREN AND
EVERYTHING. LOVE IS SEX, SEX IS LOVE. WE SAY, YOU SHOULD BE A LOVING
PERSON. NOW THAT’S THREE OF MY 10 UNDER
10. I LOVE IT. GRANDKIDS, GOD’S BLESSING FOR
NOT KILLING YOUR OWN KIDS. I OWE MY CHILDREN A SPECIFIC
DEFINITION OF LOVE. SECOND, I OWE MY CHILDREN A
MODEL OF LOVE, TO PROTECT AND PROVIDE WITH THEIR MOTHER. MOST KIDS LEARN SEEING IT
MODELED AND NOT VERBALIZED. THEY NEED IT BOTH. PEOPLE DEFINE, GOD. YES, GOD IS LOVE. BUT WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? I NEVER HAD A CHRISTIAN EXPLAIN
WHAT THAT MEANS, BUT EVERY CHRISTIAN USES GOD IS LOVE. PUT IN, GOD PROTECTS AND
PROVIDES. YES, HIS VERY NATURE IS LOVE. HIS VERY NATURE PROTECTS AND
PROVIDES. THAT’S WHAT YOU SEE IN I
CORITHIANS 13, PROTECT AND PROVIDE. AFTER I CAME TO CHRIST AT THE
UNIVERSITY. I STUMBLED WITH GOD BEING KIND
OF LIKE MY FATHER, VERY DOGMATIC AND AUTOCRATIC. I FELT THAT GOD WAS A COSMIC
KILL JOY. I HEARD THOU SHALL NOT, AND GOD
IS A COSMIC KILL JOY. DON’T DO THIS AND THAT. AND UNTIL I REALIZED, FOLKS THIS
WAS AS GREAT A REVELATION THAT I HAD THAT AFFECTED MY LIFE. WHEN I REALIZED THAT EVERY
COMMAND IN THE SCRIPTURE WHERE IT SAYS, THOU SHALL NOT IS
POSITIVE. EVERY CHILD AND GRANDCHILDREN,
IT’S A POSITIVE. EVERY SINGLE COMMANDMENT IS AN
EXPRESSION OF GOD, PROTECT AND PROVIDE. EVERY SINGLE COMMANDMENT IN THE
SCRIPTURE IS GOD’S WAY TO PROTECT YOU AND PROVIDE. GOD IS LOVE. GOD PROTECTS AND PROVIDES. EVERY COMMANDMENT IS. IN DEUTERONOMY 10:13, GOD WAS
TRYING TO MOTIVATE HIS PEOPLE TO OBEY HIS COMMANDMENTS. TODAY WE SAY IF YOU DON’T OBEY
GOD’S COMMANDMENT, HE WILL TAKE YOUR STARBUCKS CARD AWAY AND
SEND YOU TO HELL. THAT IS NOT HOW GOD MOTIVATED. FOR PEOPLE THE RIGHT MOTIVATION
TO OBEY HIS COMMANDMENTS. AND TO KEEP THE LORD’S
COMMANDMENTS AND STATUTES THAT I AM COMMANDING TODAY FOR YOUR
GOOD. IT’S TO PROTECT AND PROVIDE FOR
US. FOR OUR GOOD. EVERY CHILD REALIZED THAT EVERY
COMMAND IN THE BIBLE IS FOR OUR GOOD. I WROTE A BOOK ON IT, CALLED,
FOR RIGHT AND WRONG. AND I TOOK THE COMMANDMENTS AND
SHOWED HOW GOD PROTECTS US. AND IT’S MIND-BOGGLING TO YOUNG
PEOPLE WHEN THEY SEE THAT, BECAUSE THEY USUALLY CAN’T
PROCESS IT. IN I CORINTHIANS 3:18, IT SAYS
FLEE IMMORALITY. I AM TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHICH
CLOCK I AM WATCHING — I WENT OVER. OH, MILES FORGIVE ME, OH, GREAT
MILES. I WENT OVER. I WANT YOU TO THINK OF THIS, GOD
LOVES YOU, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? HE WANTS TO PROTECT YOU AND
PROVIDE YOU. FOR GOD SO LOVED THE WORLD, THAT
HE WANTED TO PROTECT AND PROVIDE FOR THE WORLD THAT HE GAVE HIS
ONLY BEGOTTEN SON. AND IN EXODUS IT SAYS TO PROTECT
YOUR LORD AND GOD IS A JEALOUS GOD. AND OPRAH WINFREY, SHE SAID SHE
COULD NOT SERVE A JEALOUS GOD, BUT THE DIFFERENCE IS THAT I
FOUND OUT WHAT IT MEANS. JEALOUS MEANS THAT A GOD WHO IS
PASSIONATE ABOUT HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU. THAT’S WHAT JEALOUS MEAN. HE’S PASSIONATE ABOUT A
RELATIONSHIP, THIS CREATOR BECAUSE HE LOVES AND PROTECTS. A BOOK THAT YOU NEED — PUPPY
LOVE IS YOUNG LOVE BUT YOU DON’T WANT A DOG LIFE. GUYS WHAT KIND OF PERSON DO YOU
MARRY? IF YOU WANT A QUEEN, YOU BETTER
BE A KING. I ASK THESE TWO QUESTIONS, HOW
DO I KNOW I AM IN LOVE. AND I REPHRASE IT, BECAUSE IT’S
THE WRONG QUESTION AND WHOM SHALL I MARRY. AND IT’S DIFFERENT THAN WHAT YOU
THINK, AND IN THE BOOK THE FATHER CONNECTION. AND THIS AWARD RECOGNITION, AND
HOW DO THEY RESPOND TO A SITUATION AND RESPOND THAN
REBEL. BUT IF WE DON’T CONNECT, IT
DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU DO. AND THE TWO MOST RECENT BOOKS,
THE BARE FACTS ON SEX, LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS. 39 QUESTIONS THAT PARENTS FEAR
THAT THEIR KIDS WILL ASK THEM. AND THEY DO. AND THIS IS A DVD, DIFFERENT
FROM THE BOOK, IT’S 25 STUDENTS IN A COFFEE SHOP FROM FIVE
COUNTRIES, AND I TAKE THE MATERIAL AND EXPLAIN IT AND USE
PHYSICAL THINGS TO DESCRIBE AND HELP THEM TO UNDERSTAND THE
THINGS ABOUT SEX. BUT THIS WOULD HELP YOU PUT MEAT
TO LOVE, PROTECT AND PROVIDE. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THE
PRIVILEGE OF BEING WITH YOU TODAY. GOD BLESS. [APPLAUSE]

7 thoughts on “Rock Church – Josh McDowell – Love Defined

  1. I submit that the common denominator of all real love of one person for another is to desire the ultimate welfare of the object of affection.

  2. Researching on the Hebrew roots of the term “love“, I found that precisely it implies “to provide“ principally. I knew I had heard a similar definition before… then remembered that it was from Josh and Sean McDowell, and I had to look for their references. In all of this, I gain a deeper understanding of this piece of wisdom shared by this wise men. Simple, truthful and transforming. I'm really thankful for their work.

  3. 1 John 3:16-18:
    16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. 17 If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? 18 Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.

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